Heart of Stone
by Aimless
Hakkai sighed as yet another fight broke out among his party members. It was becoming a nightly occurrence and the demon figured he’d be used to it by now. Only over the last month, the tone of the bickering and arguments changed.
Sanzo went out of his way to be particularly vicious to the golden eyed teen. Despite the fact that Gojyo started this one, the monk turned and yelled at Goku till the young demon had fled the camp. The cold steel of Sanzo’s gun kept the half demon from opening his mouth again when the blond told him to take the dishes to the nearby stream and wash them.
Gojyo stomped out of camp to do his share. Hakkai had cooked that night and Goku had gathered the firewood while Sanzo set up the tents. Normally they slept on the ground near the fire but with the onset of cold weather and the villages getting farther apart, they needed the extra protection from the elements.
The green eyed Youkai waited until he was alone with the blond. He watched as Sanzo sat ramrod stiff in front of the fire furiously smoking a cigarette. His gun lay in his lap and his hand rested on the barrel.
Not intimidated in the least Hakkai cleared his throat. “You were really harsh on Goku tonight. Would it kill you to be nicer to him? You know how Gojyo just goads him till he retaliates.”
The monk glared across the campfire. “Shut up.”
Not satisfied with the answer the demon spoke again. “Can’t you show him a little affection? He idolizes you and you treat him like something you just scraped off your boots. You continue to hurt him and still he comes back. Maybe one day he won’t.”
“Chh… who cares. He is loud and annoying and always making a scene. I really don’t want to talk about this.” Sanzo turned his back and lit another smoke.
Hakkai clenched his fists. He was perilously close to decking the sour monk. Instead he plastered his usual sweet smile on his face and counted to ten before he spoke again.
“You watch him all the time when you think no one is looking. You care about him Sanzo, even if you won’t admit it. Why can’t you tell him that? A kind word or a gentle touch is all he wants and you keep abusing him. Did you even notice how hurt Goku was when he left? Damn it Sanzo, I’m not going to sit here night after night while you take out all your pent up frustrations on him.” Despite his efforts to be calm Hakkai was losing his temper. Something that rarely happened but was frightening to see.
“Shut the fuck up! You can leave too. I don’t need you to tell me how to treat my pet.” Sanzo stood up and leveled the gun at Hakkai.
The demon’s level gaze met Sanzo’s unblinkingly and without a hint of fear. “Go ahead Sanzo, pull the trigger. See how far you get.”
The monk glared for a moment and with a curse spat his cigarette into the fire and stalked off to one of the tents. He pushed the canvas aside and disappeared. Hakkai took a deep calming breath but was still incredibly angry. He wanted to grab the monk and knock him against a tree till his teeth rattled. The beginnings of a headache throbbed at his temples and he wearily rubbed his forehead.
Hakkai sat like that for a while with his head in his hands and tried to think of a way to ease the discord in their little group. His head ached to the point that he did not hear the approaching footsteps and nearly jumped out of his skin when arms wound around his lean waist. His reflexes kicked in and he sharply elbowed the intruder in the stomach.
“Uuuumph…. damn it Hakkai, knock it off.” Gojyo wheezed.
The demon immediately relaxed against the redhead. “I’m so sorry Gojyo. I did not hear you come back.”
The half demon could hear the weariness in Hakkai’s voice tinged with a bit of pain. “Headache again?”
“Yeah… Sanzo is being such an ass. I tried to talk to him but…” Hakkai leaned back against the redhead who sat behind him.
Gojyo threaded his fingers through the brunette’s hair and started to massage his scalp. Hakkai closed his eyes and finally relaxed against under the half-demon’s talented hands. The red head knew how to seek out every knot and Hakkai was nearly purring when Gojyo’s hands slid down his neck to rub his shoulders.
“Mmmmm... that feels so good.” The brunette sighed and placed his hands on top of his lovers.
Gojyo leaned forward and lightly bit at Hakkai’s neck then whispered in his ear,
“I have a better cure for that tension headache… come to bed.” Gojyo’s sultry voice wrapped around the brunette and caused him to smile.
“Only if I get to be on top.” Hakkai answered mischievously.
Gojyo snorted and grabbed a handful of soft brown hair. He tugged tipping Hakkai’s head back so he could look him in the eye.
“In your dreams.” Then the red head lowered his lips to the snickering healer’s. Gojyo wrapped his arms around Hakkai’s chest and stroked a path down that lean body till he cupped the heat between the brunette’s legs.
The healer moaned as Gojyo grasped the growing hardness. The red head nibbled at Hakkai’s lower lip and murmured.
“Come to bed. I’m horny as hell and want to feel you wrapped around me. It’s been a shitty day and I need you.” Gojyo continued to tease Hakkai through the tight confines of his pants.
Hakkai tried to think but it was getting difficult to even remember his own name. Especially when Gojyo lightly mouthed the limiters adorning his ear.
“What about Goku?”
The red head snarled in frustration when Hakkai pulled away and turned around.
“Goku can take care of himself. I pity anything that meets him in the woods. That kid is damned strong.” Gojyo tried to pick up where he left off but Hakkai scooted a bit farther away.
“Goku is not a kid anymore and I worry about him. He was really upset when he ran out of camp. Sanzo is too harsh on him.” Gojyo could practically see Hakkai tensing up again. He worried about them all and had the head aches to prove it.
“So you noticed too huh? Our Goku is finally growing up. You should have heard the questions he was asking me the other day.” Gojyo shook his head and chuckled.
“What questions?” Genuinely curious Hakkai wondered what was so amusing.
“Well you see… um. Remember last week when we went to the river the bathe and got a bit carried away?” The red head hesitated.
“Yes I remember.” In fact Hakkai would not mind doing it again the next time they camped near a river. There was a reason Gojyo was called a pervy water sprite.
“I seems we were not alone. A curious monkey was napping in one of the trees. He did not want to bother us by climbing down and… well he saw everything. Then had several dozen questions.
Hakkai blushed bright scarlet and placed his hands over his face. If the brunette remembered the incident correctly he’d been quite vocal that day. It took a few moments before the acute embarrassment faded a bit.
“Questions? So he wanted to know what we were doing? What did you tell him?” Hakkai kind of dreaded the answer but wanted it anyway.
“Well he knew what went on between men and women… sort of. Goku got curious after he had a crush on that girl... what was her name? Houmei? Anyway the monkey’s always been an observant little shit and he had the opportunity to see a few things. Remember how pissed Sanzo was when Goku would not shut up about the girl from the inn? I think the pissy monk wore out one of his fans.”
“Yes I remember and it’s all starting to make a lot more sense now. But don’t let me interrupt you.” Hakkai waved his hands gesturing for the red head to continue.
“Well Goku had no idea that guys could do that too… hell he’d never even jacked off before. I had fun explaining that one let me tell you. Although he seemed kind of happy that two men could be together the same as a man and a woman. I expected him to be in shock or something.” Then Gojyo’s eyes widened as he looked at Hakkai. “Hey you don’t suppose…”
Hakkai nodded. “I think Goku discovered he wants Sanzo in quite a different way than he used to. Plus if I am not mistaken Sanzo seems abnormally obsessed with Goku lately too.”
“What a fucked up mess. Think they’ll ever get together? Because if I ever saw a guy that needed to get laid it is that crabby monk.” Gojyo chuckled ruefully.
“Given that fact that Sanzo is in denial and Goku is virtually and innocent I’d say no. It’s hopeless.” It actually saddened Hakkai to see his companions so miserable.
“Well God dammit, I wish they’d settle it. They’re making my life miserable.” The red head frowned. Tomorrow in the jeep would not be pleasant.
“Aw…. Does Gojyo want me to take his mind off his troubles?” Hakkai grinned.
“Does it involve a blowjob?”
“I’d say that’s a distinct possibility.”
Hakkai laughed out loud and dragged the compliant red head inside the tent while Gojyo smiled amusedly. He just loved it when Hakkai got assertive.
~*~
Moonlight washed the countryside to a pale, uniform gray and a chill wind stirred the tops of the winter bare trees. A lone figure pulled his tattered cloak tighter around his body as he sat on a thick branch high in one of the massive maples. No one was around to hear the muffled sniffling coming from the young demon as he sat with his head pillowed on his knees.
Goku had fled camp after one too many hits from that damned fan and Sanzo’s harsh words. He’d not even started the argument that had the monk go into a five minute tirade about the demon’s intelligence and generally how much trouble he had been on the journey west. All of that was par for the course. Goku had heard it many times in the past and that is not what caused his heart to clench painfully in his chest. It was Sanzo’s final words that cause him to seek solace in the wood.
“I wish I’d never climbed that damned mountain and let you out of your cage.”
Gojyo and Hakkai had frozen and stared at the monk in shock. Sanzo narrowed his eyes and lit another cigarette while the teen had run off. The demon raced through the woods heedless of the stinging branches that tore at his skin. Finally when he was out of breath Goku had picked the biggest tree he could find and had climbed up among its sheltering branches.
He had cried dammit! Why did he have to cry in front them all? Gojyo was probably going to tease him about being a wuss for a week. It was bad enough that Sanzo seemed upset with the teen most of the time but to wish he had never released Goku from his prison was enough to cause more pain than any physical injury.
The golden haired monk had been the only bright spot in Goku’s long imprisonment and he had grasped that outstretched hand joyfully. As if by magic the manacles and chains that had adorned his wrists for longer than he could remember opened and fell to the ground. Sanzo was like the sun breaking from behind a wall of clouds. It was adoration at first sight from Goku. He followed the monk with worshipful adoration. He looked at his sun as a father figure and sibling rolled into one. Although the last year his feelings started to change and Goku felt horribly confused. He knew what love was and had adored the monk for years. But now when Sanzo looked at him Goku’s stomach felt tight and his heart ached. On those few occasions when Sanzo touched him he had felt hot and tingly.
It was not until He’d caught Hakkai and Gojyo together that he started to understand. Goku thought that only guys and girls did that together. He’d wondered at one point what it would have been like to kiss Houmei. Even though it felt like betrayal. Goku even went to Gojyo and admitted what he’s seen. It was a total surprise that the red head did not curse him out or hit him. Goku even got to ask a bunch of questions. Though he’d not had the nerve to touch himself yet… it was kinda weird. Could he want Sanzo that way? It was wrong… Goku knew it was wrong somehow. The blond would never want him like that. Like Hakkai and Gojyo. In fact lately Sanzo had been overly cruel. The monk acted as if he hated Goku and that made him feel like crying again. It actually physically hurt to be separated from the monk. Goku wanted just once for Sanzo to smile at him. To tell him he meant something… anything to the blond. This loneliness was getting so hard to bear and he did not know how much more abuse he could take.
Goku shivered again as the wind found every hole in his cloak. It was too cold to stay in the woods and he had to go back to camp sooner or later. Wiping his wet cheeks with his sleeve Goku climbed down to the ground. He slunk back to the camp and hesitated near the fire. The two tents were barely visible and judging by the noises coming from the one Hakkai and Gojyo shared sleeping there was not an option. Goku considered lying down beside the fire but there would be frost on the ground by morning and he was already shivering.
The young demon crept to the other tent and stood at the closed flap. He listened carefully and heard only the soft sound of breathing and the occasional murmur. Sanzo was asleep and it was safe to go in. Goku could be very quiet when he wanted to and it was odd but the monk never reacted to his presence while sleeping as a threat. If anyone else were to approach the slumbering blond they would have the business end of his banishing gun stuffed up their nose. Cautiously he crawled inside.
Sanzo lay all the way over to one side facing the center of the tent. His golden hair peeked above the blankets as he slept. The selfish monk had also used all the bedding leaving the rest of the small space bare. Damnit! Goku thought as he looked around. He was not going to lie in the grass like a dog. He was cold! Goku made a decision as he removed his shoes, shoulder armor and cloak. Sanzo would just have to share.
As if his life depended on it Goku gingerly lifted the edge of the blankets and crawled inside. There was plenty of room between the two as he squirmed around enough to get comfortable. Then as Sanzo’s familiar scent enveloped him Goku felt himself finally start to relax. The blankets warmed by the monk’s body slowly drove the bone deep chill from Goku as his golden eyes slid shut. One heavy sigh laced with weariness and sorrow escaped his lips before he too succumbed to sleep.
They were not unobserved though. The merciful Goddess smirked as she watched Goku shift in his sleep until he was laying up against the blond. She chuckled as the monk’s arms wrapped around the small form. Their subconscious desire to be close to each other was quite apparent as they slept.
“Kanzeon how long can you deny what is in your heart? If only you would accept what your little pet has to offer. The road you travel is a long and hard one and you will need his love and devotion. The walls you have built around your heart have made you bitter and lonely and if you push Goku away you are doomed to fail. Ah nephew what am I to do with you?”
Sanzo frowned in his sleep as if he heard the hushed words and as they faded away he held the young demon even closer.